I asked the good folks of Instagram to send me some questions and they certainly delivered. There were the straight forward questions...
Are you a feminist?
What is your favorite snack?
Siggis yogurt or if I'm out in my neighborhood a chocolate croissant* from Hungry Ghost.
Where do you go to for inspiration?
Instagram and blogs. I've looked to ManRepeller since college for when I'm feeling funky, but as far as practical dressing goes, Refinery29 is where it's at. As for Instagram, I've found so many great women styling bodies of all sizes. Fashion ain't limited to sample sizes. Here's a few Instagram gals I've been looking to for style inspiration.
Can you weigh in on the "dressing for your body" concept?
I think this is total BS. Yes it is very frustrating when your favorite brands don't make proportionate sizing options when you're bigger than a 6. But that doesn't mean you can't make trends work for you. I've made it a point to follow more Instagram "influencers" with my similar proportions. If they can rock mensware without being a size 2 so can I. Plus size clothing tends to emphasize the drapey tunics and skinny jeans, but you'll never know what looks go on you until you try it. Also, screw flattering. If I want to wear something it's usually because it's aesthetically pleasing to me, not because it makes me look skinny. Don't let the ultimate goal of your final ensemble be to disguise your rolls. Stop hiding, and dress how you want. I thought I couldn't do the wide leg pant thing, but I saw a couple of Insta-girls rocking it, and I look damn cool in my pics, right?
You've said you've struggled with body image, yet you keep posting photos of yourself. How do you do body confidence?
I ignore it. This may not be the best way to handle it. But I just try not to dwell on my body. That and I don't have a full length mirror to stare at my naked body until speckles and lumps become literal demons. I have countless passing thoughts of feeling unworthy and disappointed in the way I look. I had moments where I cringed over wedding photos because I thought I looked different in the mirror. But what can you do? I just refuse to let these private moments of disgust effect my day to day life. Because I was having a great time in those photos and everyone loved me for me. Everyone knows what I look like in person! I'm not fooling anyone with a flattering outfit.
What is the worst thing Colby has accidentally said about you when he meant to compliment you?
He once told me I had softball thighs. Like it looks like I used to play softball. I stopped him before he could elaborate.
What's the worst date you've ever been on?
I feel like I have a few qualifying answers for this one, but I'm going to pick the one that made me laugh, not cry. (that can be a post for another time) The guy picked me up and drove us to a bar, but before we got out of the car he made us listen to some Grateful Dead song in its entirety. He let his eyes roll back in dude extasy upon some connection he made with the band's "soulful spirit." We got drinks in the bar. He ordered us shots. lol ok. But I was in walking distance from my house, so I wasn't worried if I needed to exit hastily. He told me he liked me because I didn't think his jokes were funny. He told me I was "like a lion." Ew. The night ended abruptly about three drinks in when he told me his dreams of outfitting a van so he could make/produce adult films with co-eds. He asked if I could be the girls' babysitter, because you know, I didn't really look the part to actually be in the film? Lol bye. Looking back he could have been a serial killer.
My mom just said she wanted to know more about my life... so here's a quick day-in-the-life-of-Abbey (the good, bad, and ugly)
I wake up around 8:30 (I know, the joys of NYC-living, nothing is open until 10). Scroll through my phone in the hopes that someone important followed me on Instagram or am alerted of something awful Trump said while I was asleep, so I am prepared for what Fox News has to say about it on the TV's in the elevator to my office. Feed my cats. Wash my face. Spray lots of dry shampoo in my hair and slap on a bit of makeup. Run out the door by 9:20. Grab an iced coffee and maybe a chocolate croissant* from Hungry Ghost. Listen to "My Favorite Murder" or "Fresh Air" for my 45 minute commute and pray someone doesn't sneeze on me/practice mindful breathing to avoid panic attacks. Arrive at work and respond to angry reader voicemails. Write. Edit. Eat sad desk lunch with some combination yogurt, PB&J, banana, sweet potato, leftovers. Print important things. Leave at 6 for commute home. (This is the part where I sometimes go to therapy or meet a friend for a drink.) Rearrange my "getting ready" accouterments so Colby doesn't remark on my slobbish tendencies. Eat some variation of chicken, veggie, starch. Watch the only channel Colby and I can agree on, Food Network. Scroll through YouTube videos in bed. Fall asleep around midnight.